Hey guys!
Am I really writing this? Did I not injure myself and end up in a extremely realistic dream? For some reason last night, my secret is no longer... secret. I can happily say that at 1:23 am this morning, I came out as Transgender via a tweet. Okay, forget I mentioned the tweet part because that's definitely the weirdest way to come out but the point is, I'm free from the mask. However, my blog is not. Who I am continues to stay secret and I'm sticking with Emma rather than my unfortunate real name.
How did this come about? Well, ages ago I came very close to putting a status on Facebook about it. I wrote a draft on paper and thought about it, but threw it away. Last night, I had the same feelings but ignored them because I could never imagine doing it. I read for a little while (Girl Online, which is incredible may I add!) then headed over to Facebook and talked to one of my friends for a bit. We started talking about the secret and I thought more about telling people. After a while, I decided to write a draft on Twitter. It was straight to the point:
"So plot twist, I'm actually sort of Transgender. Yes, I just came out by tweeting it. No one expected that right?"
I sent a screenshot to my friend and she thought I should do it, then I checked with some other friends. It's off topic but it's amazing how many people are awake at one in the morning. Anyway, they all thought I should so I did. A few people saw it and from that moment on, there was no turning back. I had a small panic attack which I might even do a blog post on because I do get them now and then. And that was it. I went to sleep and when I woke up, nothing had changed really. This afternoon though, I realised something.
As today has gone on, more people have seen it on Twitter or on Instagram. People who I have maybe seen around school or have only spoke to once or twice. Some of them messaged me saying "So proud of you! I'm always here if you need me" and I don't talk to them. Maybe it's just something you do even if you don't mean it, but these random people who I've spoken to, have shown me that anyone can be a friend to you. It doesn't matter if you like the same things, or watch the same TV show's. Something like this can show which people are genuine and kind hearted.
As well as this, I'm not the world's most confident person. I've just finished reading Perks Of Being A Wallflower and part of the story is about feeling infinite. Feeling infinite means that you're greater than great, that every problem is none existent. You're care free and you can do anything... That's how I'm feeling right now. Infinite. This has given me a huge confidence booster.
I don't know if my audience is made of Transgender people who are seeking advice or non-Transgender who find it entertaining. If you are Transgender, don't hide it. I'm still hiding it from my family (which I'm doing a good job of so far) but the people you spend the most time with, you might as well tell. If you have a school anything like mine, people have their own problems to worry about and really, coming out as Transgender doesn't receive the shocked reaction you'd expect it to. Don't hide behind a mask because society doesn't accept you. Society needs to change and that's what Transgender and Homosexual and Bisexual and anyone else is doing; making society accept things.
If you're not Transgender but you're reading this, the only advice I can give you is to be there for people. People share things for a reason so if you're best friend says "I self harm", don't be horrible about it and tell everyone. Be there for them because if it's a big thing to them, it needs to be a big thing to you even if you don't feel like it is. My amazing friends who knew about me have all been there for me and that's partially why I did what I did last night. If someone has people to support them, they're going to feel better about it. So be that person who's there for them.
If you know someone who's Transgender, send them a link to the blog because this is what I want to do. I want to be there for people and help them out no matter what their ethnicity, religion, age or location is. I'm hoping this makes up for all the times I've missed a post. And I also need to communicate with readers more so now I ask you a question. What do you feel needs changing most in society? Is it the way we handle racism, what we accept and don't accept etc. Post in the comments with your answer and if we get enough comments, maybe I'll reply to some of them!
Love you all,
Ems!
I think society is pretty fucked up. They tell you to be yourself and then judge you when that's what you do. People wishing today's society need to stop being so far up there own backsides and realise that there are loads of other people out there who are just as fucked up as they are. Maybe if people began to realise this, we'd have some hope of supporting each other. Everyone is struggling, some are just better at hiding it than others.
ReplyDelete